PG&E sends relief to california black out and wildfire victims, kits for smores

The Pacific Gas & Electric Company has devoted itself to sending help to the 2 million residents in 36 counties that have faced power shutdowns and the evacuees fleeing from the wild fires.  Given the new winds set to stoke the fires PG&E plans on cutting power for an extended period of time.

After facing backlash about the solution, PG&E ignored complaints, but once the media exposed the ignored pleas before the fire got them, PG&E tapped middle management to ask for a solution to the PR and morale crisis.  Notoriously crappy boss, Jayden Haack, had the idea for a pizza party, but 4 million slices of pizza was impossible to make on such short notice.  Not to be deterred, he hatched a plan.

In a joint effort of loud speakers, and planes, because tv was unwatchable without power,  PG&E air dropped graham crackers, chocolate bars, and marshmallows to fleeing residents while loudly declaring a PG&E camp out state wide with a complimentary camp fire provided for residents at absolutely no charge.

When questioned about the ethics and the damages all the outages are causing, PG&E told The Satira that they were thankful for the feedback and would continue providing excellent customer service, and that they were so grateful the public has adopted such a green energy conservation approach to the wild fires.


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