NRA To Solve PR Problem With Gun Control Supporters Over Near Constant Mass Shootings, Free Sample Day

The National Rifle Association is facing a massive backlash from the population after the United States has experienced more mass shootings than it has days this year with no signs of slowing down.  After attacking school shooting victims, lobbying against any kind of gun control, and using dead children as opportunities to run fund raisers for themselves, the court of public opinion has been damning to the organization.

In accordance with tradition, the NRA has blanket denied any accountability in any of the on goings and continued to force the issues of arming everyone and killing "Bad Guys" as a duty every American has.  In light of this, they focused on the problems of mass shootings being seen as bad because they are shocking, and true to form for the NRA they took immediate action to propose a half thought out plan.

Beginning at the first of next month, the NRA formally invites all gun control supporters to come to their headquarters and participate in a free sample mass shooting.  The board for the NRA says they hope to normalize mass shootings even more so than they have already, and the ones that do not survive cease to be a problem for the NRA. 

In a statement to The Satira an NRA spokesperson is quoted as saying, "Its genius, addition through subtraction, and the ones that survive will be too scared NOT to have a gun.  That is one of our already tested, tried and true methods."

When asked about the legality of the mass shootings, it was said they would be done in Texas, with a waiver, by police officers, and the waiver would declare all participant's ethnicity as African American, so they have a high expectation of no charges being filed as well as no steps made to even prevent the occurrence.


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